I. cannot. believe. I’m. doing. this.
But first . . . one of the best pieces of advice I’ve ever gotten was to NOT get Glamor Shots done. What did I do? The instant some second-rate version of Glamor Shots temporarily set up in an abandoned mall space in Anchorage, Alaska in 1993, I ran down there immediately to get myself glamorized and immortalized on film. So for all you Works for Me Wednesday people, take my advice and don’t get your Glamor Shots taken.
Why am I posting this? It’s not for NaBloPoMo. It’s certainly not because I think it’s cute. And it’s not because I’m a proud woman. I’m doing it for my tens of readers (who happen to be my friends on Facebook). They demanded I post the recently unearthed Glamor Shots from the early 1990’s. I’m doing it because I love them. Either that or I have lost all dignity. I’m just praying that no one in our church’s a/v department is nursing a grudge against me.
So without further adieu, let the humiliation-fest begin.
Or maybe it should be called “The Earring” or “The Eye” or “The Hand” or “The Hump on The Back of My Neck That Doesn’t Exist in Real Life.” The photographer must have been a genius to just get one of everything in the picture.
“No Really, My Eyes Are the Same Size in Real Life”
And yes, by all means, if you already have a purple wrappy thing, purple gloves, and a huge rhinestone necklace and earring set, you aren’t overdone at ALL! You need the tulle to finish it off in a classy, polished way.
And nothing adds class to the blingy jacket like a white tag in the back. Nothing. And my cadaver-like hand next to my made up face? Priceless. Yes folks, this was before I started waxing my eyebrows.
“I”m Sorry, I Can’t Hear You Over My Eyebrows”
That, my friends, is the shade of neon white skin only Alaska can bring you. My head also appears to be a bit disembodied.
“SEE! I Don’t Have A Neck Hump!”
This must’ve been later in the shoot because my hair looks like it’s in full on bird nest mode.
That’s it. I hope you’re all happy. This certainly keeps me humble.