The Misadventures of Cheri

Mortifying my kids one swimsuit at a time

Literally

on April 25, 2010

Yeah, I know I didn’t post yesterday.  I had some sort of resident evil set itself up in my stomach and intestines.  I figure I’ll blog twice in one day before the end of the month.  Everyone deserves a sick day.

Today was gorgeous and I have a very, very sunburned left arm and neck to prove it.  The right arm isn’t so bad . . . .I was standing with my left side towards the sun for 3 1/2 hours pressure washing the sea of cement we have.  I was in my happy place, trying to drown out the unrelenting “WaAaAaAaAaAa” of the pressure washer, when I saw a very ratty rv trying to pull into the driveway across from me.

That driveway is steep and I know there’s no way the rv is going to make it up there.  Then it starts to back into my driveway.  And it kept coming and coming and coming.  I had to jump out of the way.  Are you KIDDING me?  As I’m jumping, trying to avoid certain death, I notice the license plate frame.  It reads “Shining the Path to Jesus.”  Apparently they were taking that literally.  But I really wasn’t planning on having a cesspool of an rv back over me and shine my path to Jesus today.

El Gross-o RV did manage to leave a nice scratch in the cement of my driveway.   But I didn’t care.  I was too busy wondering if I should yell out, “HEY!  Nice try but you missed killing me!”  Which they totally would have heard because they parked across the street from my house.   And they would have really heard it when they walked past my house and into a house down the street.

And if they’re still there in the morning, I’m going to go over and kick a tire.

As soon as I make sure they’re not actually inside.

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